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Ageing disgracefully - but where? |
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Thursday, 01 May 2008 |
Iain Clacher
Plans to establish Australia's first gay aged care facilities will continue, despite High Court judge Michael Kirby's dismissal of the concept at a forum on ageing in Sydney last weekend.
Ageing Disgracefully: back left-right: Justice Michael Kirby, Jane Marsden, Stevie Clayton,
Lloyd Grosse, Julie McCrossin, Mark Orr. Front left-right: Ghassan
Kassisieh, Siri May, Carmen.
The jurist told the AIDS Council of NSW's 'Ageing Disgracefully' forum he would not like to see aged care facilities become "ghettoised" and would prefer existing facilities to become more gay-friendly.
However, Sydney transsexual Carmen, 80, said she would like to see gay-specific homes.
"We should have a place for people like us who are getting on and need
some help, because I know there's a lot of people around who are living
in dungeon little rooms and battling and struggling and they're just
too proud and too embarrassed to ask for help," she said.
Kirby said it was important that existing retirement homes, many of them church-run, be made more gay-friendly. He urged churches to be more accepting of same-sex couples.
"It may not necessarily be appropriately dealt with by law. It may
require changes within the churches themselves, and that's why people
of spirituality have to reach out, who are gay, have to reach out to
the churches and try to open a dialogue about this thing,” he said.
"Something that has lasted for hundreds and hundreds of years isn't
going to change overnight, but it won't change unless people stand up
who can persuade and cajole and put their point of view and basically
get to be known.”
Despite the misgivings of some, plans are already underway to build gay aged care facilities in Tasmania.
Dr Stephen Edwards, who heads a Hobart group hoping to establish the first GLBT aged care facility, told Evolution Online many gay people would prefer the right to decline and die with dignity among other gays and gay-friendly residents and staff.
"We feel there is a shortage of beds and a shortage of sympathy for gender diverse people in nursing homes," Edwards said.
"Gay people in nursing homes tend to go underground and back into the closet. There are documented cases of abuse in nursing homes, and care staff are often not highly qualified.
"Gay residents can experience ostracism by other residents, which makes them more isolated and depressed, so they hide the fact that they’re gay, and their partners are passed off as relatives. That’s pretty sad.”
Edwards said he based his opinion on many years’ experience as both a nurse and a doctor in nursing homes here and in Britain.
"Fifty per cent of facilities are sub standard and a lot of them you wouldn’t put your dog in," he said, adding that the accreditation process had failed to ensure quality.
"Gay people have an aesthetic, a style of doing things that’s different to the heterosexual population."
Edwards said he would like to establish a series of small-scale, gay-specific facilities that would be run as non-profit charities.
"If there are over 50 residents, it becomes like a factory. But if we can set up a model on a small scale that works, we could open further small scale facilities.
"I think that if a gay nursing home opened it would fill immediately."
Though previous attempts to open gay-specific aged care facilities in Australia have failed, Edwards said earlier plans had tended towards the "grandiose".
His wish list includes a well-maintained garden, carpets and table linen, friendly staff with time to chat, access to sunshine, pets, an entertainment officer, a piano bar, a heated pool, massage and art classes.
It should provide, "a sense of space, beauty and contemplation for our final days".
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